


yee yee

by abiotic_butterfly, JustYourEverydayTsundere



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA, Help, M/M, Why do I do this, im so sorry, please dont take this seriously oh my god
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-11
Updated: 2019-05-18
Packaged: 2020-03-01 03:13:40
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 927
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18791839
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/abiotic_butterfly/pseuds/abiotic_butterfly, https://archiveofourown.org/users/JustYourEverydayTsundere/pseuds/JustYourEverydayTsundere
Summary: Lance and Keith get lost at the s o u p store.





	1. chapter one

**Author's Note:**

  * For [abiotic_butterfly](https://archiveofourown.org/users/abiotic_butterfly/gifts).



> i worked really hard on this chapter. there will be a new chapter everyday uwu owo

“Keith makes me owo he is so cute oh myg od i wont let my hterosexual tendanceies get in the way today,” said lance 

He pish poshed his way out of the homo store. s o u p. 

“Being herterosexual is for pussies”

“i didnt fuck my cat. i didnt cum on my cat. i didnt put my dick anywhere near my cat. Ive never done anything weird with my cats. I promised myself i wasnt going to make apology videos after last years thing so im just trying to be as short and honest with this as possible.” ketih muttered to himself as he walked down the s o u p asile 

“Hey keither, did you know mlk wasbrekafast broth. It should be in s o u p asle writh cereal because cereal is just breakfast s o u p. 

“Hey, fuck you, my favorite s o u p is sald. Only hetereosexuals eat a salad and gays eat s o u p.” said keithe in an angry rage. “The behavior im witnessing is absolutely terrible and i will destroy the world one day and ittll be your fault.” With that, he demolished the s o u p aeils and walked out of the store.


	2. chapter two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> i hate this

“Who awas that beautfiul boi i just witnessed walk out of thew s o u p asiel?” lance asked pideeeeeeeeeonnngngggg. 

“He sis a fergkt but I lovi helm anatway” Lance, screaming, crying, revolting, retching, and attacking the floor or the Walmart. 

Old wokelne looked on at the strange scene of lance as he blasted the floor downtown his firsts.


	3. Lol Whoops

“I can’t believe he’s gay,” cried lance in absolute terror. “This is such bad news even though im a guy and he’s a guy and i love him but im not gay. Im staright.” 

Keith was eyeballing Lances hand, ready for the accak to strike down upon the poror straight person. He went in for the kill; grabbing the other man’s hand in an act of defiance to his hetreosexual agenda. 

Lance shrieked in terroir at the fact that Keith has just permitted sin to happen in the middle of the s o u p aisel. 

“Wat the frixk frack patty wack was that for?!” He crued. 

“Im a wore you bitch” Keith yanked his hand and pulled Lance closet to him. “You know wha six leads to.” He warmed.

Lances eye widened, “you didn’t use a glove!?!?! What the fuck!!!” 

Keith started crying, “I wasnt expecting it you absoulte hecc. This is unbelieveable. God is going to be so angry at me and it’s all your fautl.” 

Lance glared at him, “It wasnt my fault. It’s always the twinks fault” 

“Youre a twink!” keith attacked with no remorse.

“You lier. Lars x ruby go to hell.” Lance screamed abck.  
Kieth, “youre supposed to respect the creators, lance, this is super untolerable”

“I’m not paying for your sin child, you must Yeet it back to god.” Lance declared 

“I dont want to perfrom the yeetus feetus deleetus >:(“ said keith angrily. “You will suffer with me and my child.” 

“Never, God wouldn’t approve.” Lance screeched.

“I dont care about god,” keith defendid 

“What the fuck is wrong with you??!?!?!” He screamed. 

“What’s wrong with you!!!???!?!111??/?1 yeetus feetus is aganist god too!”

“If you misscary it doesn’t count!! Just freaking drink hot ass s o u p” Lance suggested

“I always drink hot ass s o u p. Im immune to it” 

All of the sudden Lance whipped out his old fashioned beet box and started blasted Heathers, the riverdale covers.


	4. OwO

Lance was about to start tetris beat boxing when he tripped on his shou and face planeted into the flour. “Yo gay” 

Sister James Charles appeared in front of them. “Goid morning sisters, it’s me, Jam.” He leaned over, his assless chaps dawning the attention of everyone. 

“No! I not gay! I not gay!” He scramed. 

James shook his hand and grabbed his hand, his HAND. “I’mma celery, that means that you are no longer strit. I deiide your sexuality fucking bitch” 

J.K rowling eventually appeared to challenge ajmes, “no sister. Only i can declare pepole gay.” 

Keith was appaled, “I was supposed to be Lang’s one true love. What the ever fucking hell do you too think your doing!!?1111?!?!?” 

He stampeeded his foot down and yeeked, “what am I supposed to do with the bastard child now??!??!”

JK cakled, “hahahahahahahahah silly mortal. I shall just delete it!!!!!!!!!!!!” 

She went to oepn ehr oofers when a starbucks trenti pinkity drinkity came out of no where, knocking her oof balance and sending her witches brew bidy to the dloor.

Jame hufflepuffed, “only I get a say you dang cunt.” 

Lance did a backflip and skurted out of the s o u p isle, leaving a crying Kieth alone.

Chapter 5

“You saud you wanted to met?” asked keith in panci 

“Yeah, youre gay lmao” lance laughed at him and kicked his stomach


	5. Almost The End My Friend

“You saud you wanted to met?” asked keith in panci 

“Yeah, youre gay lmao” lance laughed at him and kicked his stomach


	6. It’s The End

Kieth started cring, his arms wrapping around his stomach. “What the hell! Why did you do this?!?! 

“God will love me now. It’s all over. Dont worry. I love you” 

“But it was my baby! EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

“lol it’s not dead, it’s just not living anymore. Jeez, calm down” 

Keith didnt listen he was too busy cryongggg. 

“Im done with this.” lance groaned and walked out of the s o u p store, leaving keith behind

Fin.


End file.
